Assalamualaikum. My name is Chakra.

Ok, so everyone’s jumping on the bandwagon. I think, for a new year, we’d see new hope. New visions. New mindsets and such. A new Malaysia. And when I say a new Malaysia, it’s not the infrastructures, the smooth roads, (and even the ones full of potholes at Shah Alam), or even the cars.

I talk about the people of Malaysia.

Now, that I have that in the retrospect, it’s time to delve into the issue that would normally have me sitting by the side of the road, shaking my head, and watch the constant contradiction between 2 major sides happen, albeit like a tennis match here.

The usage of the name Allah by the Herald. I’m not gonna do a recap for ya’ll. Read the newspaper and such on that.

Okay. Things like these usually have me at the side of the court. Or on the fence. When we talk about religion in Malaysia, it’s like being a cross-dresser walking in the streets of Jamaica. You’d be bashed up; verbally or physically. Period. And most of my friends are Muslims, and for the sake of not hurting their feelings, I won’t say much. I respect the religion, but I respect my friends more. As I’ve said, or written before this, the religion is never a measuring stick of a person’s credibility. The character of a person is.

With that being said, I apologize beforehand to all who might find my writing offensive and such. And if you do wish to comment on the situation or disagree with me, do so in a civilized manner. I’m no God of the world, but I can delete them useless comments. That’s MY divine intervention.

I’m not going to talk about the legal battles pertaining to this issue. I don’t wish to dissect and do a post-mortem of the case, and post my comment. That’s all the newspapers’ job.

I’ll comment on this as a whole.

These past few days, religious groups have been popping up Facebook. Not for spiritual enlightenment, no. It actually came up BECAUSE of this very issue. 2 groups in particular caught my eye. And these 2 groups have opposite goals and such. I’ll just put the address here for you to see and decide who you think it right.

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=227724322514&ref=search&sid=726659216.4085029105..1

And the other.

http://www.facebook.com/group.php?v=wall&ref=nf&gid=248123628088

All I can say is, if YOU KEEP TALKING LIKE THIS, IT WOULD SEEM THAT YOU’RE VERY VERY VERY ANGRY AND GRRRARGHDIEEE!!!!

Meanwhile, the other website seemed more peaceful. Man, it is true!! It’s all about the presentation!! :P

Okok, jokes aside la.

Everyone has their own opinions over the matter. Some seem to agree with the court’s decision, some don’t. Others just shrug their shoulders and go on having their coffee. We seem to become more opinionated however, when the issue is politicized or smeared with an icing of racial or religious issue.

Personally, I don’t see what the big hullabaloo is. Some say the name Allah is translated, and actually purely synonymies the Lord, or God. Upon talking to a Muslim, he explains however, that Allah is especially pertained for the Muslims only, and it means something that only the Muslims can relate to. Or, that’s what he said, I would hope to believe, to summarize.

I read what both sides have to say. Referring to other websites, asking people questions, until I had an epiphany. A revelation.

What does it matter if 600 years ago, this happened? Or 502 years ago that happened? People from either side are opening their history books, riffling through it looking for a loophole. Some are putting articles that are dated wayyyyyyyy back, which as fascinating and interesting as it is, doesn’t serve a purpose for me. True, we want proof and such.

Think for a second;

On second thought, make it a minute all of you. What does it matter what was done hundreds of years ago? What does it matter what other faiths want to name their deity? I’ve said the name Allah a dozen million times and I did not become a Muslim. Neither did my Muslim friends become confused when I said Allah.


Muslim friend: Darn, I forgot to bring my notebook today.
Me: Ya Allah.
Muslim friend: OMG I’m CONFUSED! AM I MUSLIM OR HINDU???? YOU SAID THE ‘A’ WORD!!!!


Neither is it a confusion when I say ‘Assalamualaikum.’ And I can spell that correctly without googling it mind you. It just means ‘peace be upon you’ no? But sadly, I’ve met people who’ve said this to my face.


Me: Hey man, Assalamualaikum.
Friend: You can’t say that la! You’re not Muslim!
Me: Urm, ok. Ni hao then.


But I Digress.

The name Allah is used by many. The reason the Christians use it, is because their publication runs in the Malay language. So, as to translate the name ‘Lord’ or ‘God’, they opted for Allah instead. I have Christian friends at Sabah and Sarawak. Upon asking them if the name ‘Allah’ made them confused, they just shook their heads and said

“Well, it pertains to God. What’s there to be confused about? It’s just in another language, that’s it.”

To me, my faith is never tested. Regardless what the name of my God is. And believe you me, the Hindus HAVE PLENTY. Which are representations of different aspects of life. And I certainly won’t go berserk and join a facebook group ‘Membantah penggunaan nama Vishnu oleh golongan bukan Hindu’ if a non-Hindu friend of mine said the word ‘Vishnu’ out of nowhere. That’s just crazy.

It would seem that if your faith is strong, and you have a good foundation on it, no one can take it away from you. God tests us, to see how we fare. And with that, I end this brouhaha. Happy new year kids!

Eywa!

Ok, so here’s what I have to say about James Cameron’s Avatar.

The first half of the movie has the most dialogues for me. Then from thereon forward, it’s a mind-dazzling display of cinematography.

Sigourney Weaver was awesome in this movie. She was the only one for me that was well casted. The others were just bleh.

You know the movie really is awesome when you wish you were a Na’vi. You wanna climb tall trees, fly on those mean birdies, are hitch a ride on the ‘Last Shadow’. The action, the humor, and the dialogues were good. At some moments, you question the main character’s credibility by him throwing away his belief on the entire human race, and turning to fight against them.

Man, the humans are represented as exploitative, greedy, inhuman (how ironic), and rude. Which is somewhat really true.

Behind the special effects, arrays of dazzling colors and storyline is a deep message. The way we treat Mother Nature. When the Na’vi kills something, they utter a prayer for the creature they had slain, thanking it for the flesh it’s about to offer and such. When a tree is destroyed by the humans, they cry. The connection the Na’vi feels with the forest is linked by an unexplainable bond.

The message is clear really. We should appreciate where we’re living in. And IF we do go to another planet, respect their people’s culture too.

Ok, back to the movie again. The storyline isn’t so perfect. But, they make up for the effects and all, as I’ve said earlier. The movie is almost 3 hours by the way, but worth every second of it. Too bad the idiot snoring next to me had to ruin it for me for at least 1 hour in the movie.

To watch or not to watch the movie? Watch!

To re-watch or not to re-watch the movie? Re-Watch!

To become a Na’vi or not to become a Na’vi? Become!

I can’t wait for the trilogy!

Less is more. At least that's what they all say.

Gah, my sem 3 results are out. Shocking. I scored an A for a paper I studies the least for, with a low assignment score to accompany it. How's that even possible??

Not that I'm not thankful. Hey, an A is an A, be it a - or a +.

Someone commented that I was being a tad bit too serious with my blog posts, with HIV, nursing and such, and all I can reply is

'Well, whaddya want me to write about??'

To which he didn't have an answer for. Ok, nvm, onto more serious matters! The Princess and the Frog! Dum dum dum, dumdumdum, dumdumdum! (yea wrong movie I know, but it could happen!)

I had a great time watching it. Period. You know how the ending is gonna be like. You know there has to be an introduction, the exposition, the climax, the betrayal part, the fight against evil, good triumphs over evil, the lovers have... oh wait. wrong genre.

Moving along.

What gives this movie an edge over the other movies, is the fact that it pays tribute to where the setting is, New Orleans. Jazz, and broadway. Mmmmm. You can just smell the music that emanates from the back ground. The songs were shamelessly infused with heavy broadway essence which was something I really loved.

You can't stop but just enjoy every single bit of the movie. The feeling of criticizing the movie is long gone, cause you'd just feel to guilty about complaining about a feel-good movie. Damn heart-string-pulling-genres Walt Disney seems to be good at. But it's all fair in love and movie productions.

It's a really must watch, for all you jazz lovers out there. And it doesn't hurt that the movie has witty dialogues, and silly moments that'd make you laugh la. Go. Spend that money. Get a popcorn while you're at it. It's all worth it.

Of HIV and shaking hands.

It's no secret that the spread of HIV is getting more prevalent. I would say more rampant than the Influenza H1N1. But, the media chooses to cover the flu more closely, like it's a celebrity sex tape and all. Don't get me wrong, the flu is serious business, but, with the media attention that it gets, one from the healthcare field, (or any other field for that matter) may ponder for a moment; is all the attention worth it?

Let's bring some light into this issue. I've worked in the hospitals before. And from what I see, people DIE of anything but the flu. Well, that's what my experience dictates. Don't get me wrong that the H1N1 issue should be taken lightly; it is serious. But, the spread of HIV, and other diseases should be brought up front too no?

I had the pleasure of actually meeting someone with HIV+ . She contracted it from her husband apparently. Although nervous, I did ask her a few questions, since she was a counsellor for HIV+ people; and her answers really did enlighten me. For one, the media doesn't really focus much on this, as they should.

When I say 'Media focus', I'd hope that they would bring it out into the open, that it isn't a disease that can be contracted via a handshake. Crushing the stigma of the public's perception over the disease is imperative, before we can actually prevent the spread of the disease. My friend recalled an experience, that when she introduced herself as a HIV+ person, people withdrew their hands to avoid handshakes.

I guess hugs and kisses were out of the question too.

I also met a Chinese chap about my age in the wards. Very well educated, doing his degree and all, fluent in English, and he had good looks too. He had a STD, known as syphilis. He was somewhat shy to admit it, but once we got talking, he was actually eager to entertain my curiosity. He admitted to having multiple sexual partners and whatnots, and regretted every moment of it.

Although one could easily judge his every decisions that very moment, I kept my opinions to myself.

Some nurses were unkind though. Behind his back, they'd remark:
'Tu la, siapa suruh gatal sangat?' or something along the lines of 'Kids now days are just plain bad la' while munching on their karipaps and kuih lapis, depending on what's on the pantry tables.

One can't help feel angry and annoyed. Who are they to pass snide remarks of other people. It's easier to throw stones on others when you THINK you're on higher ground. That's what sucks bout us humans. We love throwing stones. Figuratively.

I enjoyed talking to the guy. He had humor and wit, and interacting with him made me realize, syphillis wasn't what made him. He was just a normal human, who was sick. That was about it. The specialist tending to him, was also a very understanding man. He explained the progression of the disease to the boy, and ensured him that syphilis was very much treatable.

It's the attitude of these kinds of professionals that make what I do, see or hear worth every minute of it. True, it doesn't benefit me in terms of health or wealth, but, at least I view the world in a more positive sorta way. Sorta. Some idiots love ruining it for me though.

So, keep the stigma at bay. If we get rid of the negative mindset, half the battle is won.

The ongoings of the world.

Right about now, there're some political conspiracies going on in Papua New Guinea.

And there's a plot to assassinate some very important people. (Perhaps Uncle Quakers)

There's also a natural disaster coming our way, date unknown. (Pigeon poop)

Somebody's also planning to steal some money from some place with lots of money. (the piggy bank)

I think an accident is gonna happen today. (Vehicular, out of wedlock child, any accidents)


Me? Just reduced from holiday freeloader to house-cleaner. I've gotta mop, and clean, and fold and wipe. Bah.

But since I have a bit of free time, I was wondering bout the current erm... madness? (in a good way madness) of the Twilight and New Moon saga. The books, the movies, the people and such.

I'm not a big fan of the whole baa-baas, but I sorta get why people, go crazy over the whole thing. What I don't get is why do girls melt at the sight of an anemic looking hero? For the love of blood transfusions, U'd think a vampire would actually be like... red? from all the blood drinking, but they're somehow too pale. Ironic. But, feh.

Yea, as a friend said, "I wouldn't have casted it any better," and cue the vampire, the werewolf, the sheepdog (is it in the movie?) and others. I wouldn't have casted it any better either. Ashley Greene is enticing as Alice Cullen. Although she has a boyfriend in the movie... boo.

yes, this is a completely irrelevant filler-like post. Nothing much to say.

The update

My god, it's December already! Where did the year go?



I can still remember my first stint in Port Dickson, where we (my batchmates and I) were clueless in the healthcare profession. Time certainly polished and refined us. Though we don't sparkle like a 5-carat diamond yet, we're somewhere near aluminium already.



My 4 weeks in Hospital Sungai Buloh, and another 6 weeks in Hospital Tuanku Ja'afar, Seremban certainly did a lot on me. The exhaustion. The multitaskings, and such. Sungai Buloh wasn't much of a hassle. The hospital was new, and there weren't many patients.



Seremban however, was an entirely different story. Lack of things in the ward, added with the amount of patients coming in, plus grumpy co-workers could really drive you over the deep end. Thankfully, my emotions were still in check, and i didn't snap at anybody. I think.



Seremban was another sad case. It made me realize that people just die even though you've done your best to help them. Somethings are just out of your control. At most times, it's predictable. As a nurse, when you're at the patient's bedside most of the times, you develop some sort of intuition regarding the patient's prognosis.



A particular patient of mine, came in with a mild chest infection. Yet, after a week of nursing her, I could see the deterioration in her condition and such. My clinical instructor, was with me on the time of the ward rounds. She asked me to touch my patient's feet and explain what I felt. The skin was moist, yet eeringly cold. 'Cold and clammy skin' as my instructor explained. Out of the patient and family's cubicle, she mentioned that this can be an ominous sign that her end is nearing, coupled with the patient's poor response to her surroundings.



Needless to say, my patient passed away an hour later. Shocking, as it may seem, it was rather said. Sadder, when the patient's daughter took our hands (my friend and I) and thanked us profusely for helping her mother out in such trying times. It's still a learning process... Gah.



When it's predictable, it's ok. However, when death comes as a shock, how do we react to that? I've had experience nursing clients with poor prognosis and whatnots, due to cancer, liver cirrhosis, end stage kidney failures, and even sever multiple infections due to AIDS; and most of our care pertains to the palliative side. That, in other words, means 'care for the dying'.



I did learn though, this one particular day, that, a seemingly stable person could go from ok, to the whole opposite, in a matter of minutes.



I was busy doing a wound dressing for this particular old lady with multiple bedsores. (Took me 2 hours to slice through the dead skin and flesh and whatnots, and to also irrigate, wash and pack the wounds. 2 hours is bloody long btw, but she had like 7 wound sites... ), and anyways, the patient in the next bed, was a young girl, 22 years of age.



She came in due to food poisoning (if i'm not mistaken), severe vomiting and diarrhea, and also breathlessness. That morning, my friend and I changed this particular girl's bedsheets and pillow cases. She could talk to us, and seemed friendly. She was on an oxygen mask, and all. Nothing was out of the ordinary. The vomiting had stopped, and she seemed very lethargic. That was about it.



So, while I was doing this wound dressing for this old madame (@ 12noon), I could hear this young girl screaming and yelling, like she's in pain. She pulled out her intravenous lines and was thrashing about. (I couldn't see what was going on, since we had curtains over my patient's cubicle, but judging by the people trying to calm her down, the creaking of the old hospital bed, and the muffled sounds and such, one could guess.)



I sorta had a feeling that she might have a severe plunge in her condition. No idea why, I just had an inkling. But, I had to dismiss any thoughts, since the wound dressing required more attention...



After my wound dressing, I packed my things, and went straight for lunch. Yes, I know I should've checked on the young girl, but with the amount of people being there, I did not want to be a bother. She was crying. And that was the last I heard, when I went for my lunch.



Half an hour later, on returning to the ward, I noticed the curtains were drawn around the young girl. The 'teet, teet' sounds you normally hear and see on TV was emanating throughout the whole ward. It's as if everyone was quiet for some unknown puprose. Curiosity got the better of me, and when I went in, the anesthesiologist was there. They were gonna mechanically intubate this girl. She suffered a respiratory collapse, apparently. Shockingly enough, even though she was stabilized and all, she passed on bout half an hour later.

Most of us didn't take the news well. Some were just in a state of complete disbelief. The veteran nurses shook their heads, talked to the family, and went on with their work. And the cycle goes on.

I'd end my update here for now. My finals are over, and I would just love to get that rest i've been vying for. Meep.

Do do do do do, the DoDo bird went extinct.

Yes folks, there used to be a dodo bird, and yes it's extinct. No, I'm not entirely too sure if it did make those 'do do do do do' sounds. Anyways, for the first time in 7 months, I digress once again! On writing!

I are back-eth!

It's been 7 months, and yes, I know, it's long. I always apologize whenever I'm back from a hiatus... but not this time. Yes, this time I'll be providing excuses on why I couldn't make it.

• I was busy with my course
• throughout july to september, I was playing Ragnarok Online
• October to November, I was in seremban.

There, not too bad for 7 months, yes?

I'm back to just state that I'm alive. And not too well. But, more seasoned in life.

More Mursing up ahead. Thou shall sleep now. Night,

The tale of 2 cockroaches.

It's no big secret I despise cockroaches.

I mean, how could anyone learn to like em? It's mind-boggling-ly fast, it's brown, and it flies.
It's like having a shiny, brown flying turd buzz around with such high velocity to make you scream out all your great-grandparents name in the pitch of Minnie Ripperton when she sings 'Loving you'.

Ahem.

So, basically, I was back home in Shah Alam for the weekends, and it occured on a Sunday night. I was planning to get back to campus on Monday morning, and I had a test around 10am. (Which I barely studied for)

So, I was sleeping la, around, 12am or so? And it was so hot, and stuffy in my room. It's like sleeping in a small square shaped space, with poor ventilation, with the ceiling fan recycling the hot air around it, and throwing steamy air right back at you at high speed.
And then, I felt something creeping on my legs, but I sorta dismissed it, for an itch.

It became more prevalent, and I leaped out of bed. Not the way Mulan jumps. More like when Danny DeVito jumps over a ledge when he's chased by bad guys. Not to imply that I'm fat and short. (any titterings will be met with cruel injustice of the syringe)

Zoomed ahead to the switches, and I turned the lights on. And I looked at my bed, and there wasn't anything on it. I sorta sighed a sigh (what else) of relief, and looked down; and lo and behold, there it was. right next to my small toe, was a huge cockroach.

Quickly opened my door and ran into the kitchen I did. No, I'm not gonna cover it up. I pretty much get chickened by a roach. So, I reached for the Aerosol, and looked for the penyapu lidi. It's basically that broom made out of long, fine sticks, and bound together by a rafia string.

I don't know if it was judgment, or punishments for my past life, but when I reached for the penyapu lidi, then string just gave way, and all the fine long sticks/lidi dropped on the floor!
Wtf wey?!

I cursed till the cows came home, and just decided to pick as much of lidis as I can, and held it with my hands. Wasn't much, but, who cares. It came to the point, I just fumigated my room with the aerosol spray. When I went in to check whether it was dead, my somewhat sensitive ears (it is true, that when you face imminent danger, your senses boost tenfold) picked up the sound of the roach flying behind me.

Do note, that I sprayed the aerosol on the floor of my room. (And it was quite oily)

I ran out of my room again and tripped on this oily floor, and fell on my side. Needless to say I had a bruised hip for like 3 days. ouch. Imagine, a small critter able to kick me out of my room effortlessly. Twice!

Oh, and what happened to the penyapu lidi I held in my hand? I let go of it when i fell, and it now laid strewn IN MY ROOM!

Sorta had to crawl out of my room there, and headed back to the kitchen. Gathered the lidis and tied a rafia string tightly. And that's when another roach appeared. It was just laying there quietly at the corner of the kitchen, minding it's own business actually. But, the pain, suffering and humiliation had made a brute outta me.

Without spraying the aerosol, I moved in for the kill, smashing its exoskeleton repeatedly with my brutal... smashing? So, the kitchen corner was taken care of. Poor guy, when I think about it now. It was merely in the wrong place, at the wrong time.

One down, another to go. Headed back to the room, for the bane of my sleeptime. And there it was on the floor, weakened by my superior aerial apparatus of amazing-ness. (the aerosol la) And it was sorta wiggling, and half dizzy.

I knew it was now or never. It was big, and I sorta still feared it. Chanelled my energy, I did, and brought forward all thoughts that made me very angry, to combat fear. Forget happy thoughts, angry was the new black.

Ran in and gave it my first blow!

(thought of the time I ran out of coffee sachets in the midst of studying for STPM)

SMACK!

(the time an idiot irritated me with his non-existent wit)

SMACK!

(the time my car got hit by another)

SMACK!

(the time I slipped and fell on the floor which was like, 15 minutes ago)

Quadruple-embedded-strength WHACK!

and there it lay... still moving. I was panting like mad, and sweating; also like mad. (never really understood the term, but wth)

Easily disposed of it and I saw a standing fan in the living room. Plugged it in my room, mopped the floor, cleaned the areas, and yes, collected the lidis, and I went to sleep, feeling so damn proud of myself.

(sorry, the epilogue sounded dry; I just ran out of juice)

Yay. No,seriously. Yay!

Finally, after a month after scavenging, cajoling, crawling, battling, begging, pleading, and such.

(no, I wasn't negotiating an increase on my monthly allowance with my parents)

Class tests are finally over!! Yea!
For the past 4 weeks, the denizens of Nursing 2008 were subjected to murderous, villainous class tests. Such was the scheming terror they had, they ambushed us with such evil ingenuity.

Well, it was partially my fault that I confused dates in the timetable.

But all in all, it wasn't a messy affair. Managed to answer most of the questions.

We have a new PM. Well, Mr. Najib, good luck. That's all I'm gonna say.

The tests. ZE TESTU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

With the flurry of tests I had to go through these past few weeks, would've just made an entire Paris civilization stop making love.

It was THAT anticlimatic.

Class tests here. Class tests there.

Communicable disease, Microbiology, Parasitology, Pharmacology, Anatomy, Physiology...

Suicidalogy.

Massacre-ology.

Shoot-ology bunnies-logy.

Anyway... there were too many tests, that it was really taking its toll on the denizens of N108.

Friend: What's cholera?

Me: Err.... A disease?

Friend: Of?

Me: Well, they'll get diarrhoea, and rice-watery stools... And dehydration's the main cause of death kan?

Friend: Eh, how you spell *cirit-birit* ah? (ignoring my answer to her question)

Me: D-I-R-R-H-E... eh wait...
D-I-A-R-R-H-E-A?
Ey (to the class) how to spell diarrhoea??

after getting the answers;, and wasting 10 minutes in that process due to unnecessary gabbling and poobahs...

Friend: So, what's cholera?

Me: A type of fish?

Well, the tests weren't so bad. Just had a run it with some cough and sniffles... But I shall be fine! Thou shalt smite germs with thou's trusty sterile Forceps and alcohol swabs!

And, end.